Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Randomize
