First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
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