found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
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