This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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