everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Randomize
