forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
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I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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