He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
