Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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