She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
