whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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