that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
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