Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
50% drunk capacity currently
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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