I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
