i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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