someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
