I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
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