Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Randomize
