Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
how drunk are you?
Several
Randomize