He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Randomize
