He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
