8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Randomize
