yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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