You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
