Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
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False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
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First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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