mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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