Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize
