I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Randomize