Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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