just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
