I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Randomize
