Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
