god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
