just come out here and I will go home with you...
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
So apparently I’m into choking now
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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