It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
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