I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
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