You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize
