got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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