We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
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