i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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