I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Randomize
