I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
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