forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
