Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
