I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
