Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
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