Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Randomize
