Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
Randomize