Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
they're like a gay fantastic four
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
