I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
