was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
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