When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
